Chris Farley Motivational Man Imitation!! Life Updates!! Marine Corps Boot Camp Stories!!

With a super busy week of grading exams and editing Book 2, I found a small window to get this out to you all. Hilarious Marine Corps stories, a small tribute to my mom and dad, lots of laughing and even a Chris Farley Motivational Man imitation! A quick, 26 minute dense minutes of fun, hilarity, and special uplifting messages. Peace and Love to all! Have a beautiful everything!
benny mailman 

Transcript

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Hello, awesome, cool Humans of Earth! This is Benny mailman. this guy's name is Ricky Desktop. Let's listen to him here. That is some cool stuff! I also have some cool stuff for you today. I have not sure how much of that I can play. A preview is a call to action Benny Mailman. benzen42.com Be there or be square or circle or triangle. I don't know. subscribe to the newsletter. That would be super cool and awesome. I am glad you are here. I love you. We have Marine Corps stories we have Jim and Bernadine Arena, my parents I talked about them. Why are their names different from my name, last name talking about updates on life and the book. And I know you are thinking Wow, that is amazing. How could it possibly get better? What could Benny Mailman do that would possibly make this... immortal? While there is a Chris Farley imitation motivational man that I perform towards the end of the podcast and I'm sure you will enjoy it. So remember you are cool. You are awesome. You are fantastic. And I want you to enjoy Benny Mailman podcast 42 peace and love to All! Good day or good evening depending upon when you are tuning in to Benny Mailman podcast. 42 I am so happy you are here. Wonderful, super cool, awesome humans of Earth. Well, where do I find myself today? I am as a teacher finishing up the semester, I will have about 30 papers to grade. Most of them are online. But there are paragraphs that have been written by my students and I will have to grade those, which I enjoy immensely. Now the semester ends Wednesday in about two days from now. And I am very excited for the new semester to start. Where am I in the book world. I have not been talking a lot about my book or books. I sat down to write about my journey. It was nine months, October 4 2012. I went for about eight and a half months and wrote a book which ended up being three books when I presented it to a publisher. They said the average book is 55,000 words and your book is 220,000 words. Whoops. So I have book one out and a call to action. Something that I continually forget to do. I have a website benzen42.com that is B as in boy E as an elephant N as in November, zen, Z as in zebra, E as an eagle N as in November, benzen42.com that will get you to my website and on my website you can listen to my podcasts you can read my about information and you can see what I have been doing. It took me days upon days upon weeks to get all the information up to get the photos put on there to get the videos put on there. And if I knew that you were going to see those that would make me feel better, having spent that time doing it, so Once again benzen42.com. That is my website. And I would love for you to check it out on that website, you can join and get the newsletter which I have yet to do because I do not have enough subscribers yet. But I am excited for that moment when I have enough subscribers and I can put out a mini newspaper, which would be like a blog about what is going on right now I will tell you what's going on. I have officially pulled the first book finding 42 cut the rope from the presses, I am making some adjustments. I have a brand new, awesome fantastical cover for the new book, which will I actually had three covers designed to cover the three books in the series. I love them. I love the design. The designers name is Raphael, great guy originally from Spain lived in Bali for about 16 years, and now lives in Gilbert, Arizona many things to his awesome designing abilities, you will be able to check that out soon enough. When I get back out on the market. Soon as book one hits the proverbial streets again, you are able to buy it off of Amazon or one of my new publishers. I'm not sure 100% who that is going to be. So I'm going to let that sit for a little bit. But I will tell you as soon as I for sure know I'm pretty sure I know where who is going to publish it. For me. I am an independent author. So when that book is out, the audio for that book will drop seconds after the book is available. And that will be very exciting. For me the audio is amazing. Adam Trump is my narrator he is also by the way, and I probably have mentioned this in the past. He is a musical genius. Also, I'll use the word genius. He's a great friend of mine has become a great friend of mine, a great confidant. He is the one who came up with the intro for this podcast. And I love it. I absolutely love that intro and the outro Thank you, Adam, Adam did a super job with the narration I was I listened to his voice and his voice matches the soulful intent of the message and the stories and I love listening to him narrate my book, and I believe you will absolutely love it also. So that is also coming very soon. As soon as the book is ready, as soon as the audio is out, then I have been working with a marketer on publicity. And that publicity has been ready to go out for a while now. And I said hold off, let me get this done with book one the new cover the audio, then we're gonna put it out we'll do the publicity and book two will be coming out I'm guessing around September October timeframe. Book Two is what I refer to as the golden hammer. I am astonished at how I don't really know how to say this without sounding like I'm tooting my own horn. But Book Two Book Two has an advantage over book one because I learned a lot from book one I learned a lot of things a lot of the things not to do if you pay someone for editing, you still have to go through and make sure that things are correct. This book two is going to be phenomenal In my opinion, and I will enter it in competitions and see how it fares against other authors. It will be very inspiring. So as a teacher grading exams and done with a semester and a couple days as an author working on book one, putting that back out with a new cover an awesome magnificent cover book to working on the edits for that with a professional coming out in September or October as an expat living in Cambodia happy have a beautiful wife Vicheka I eat well, I sleep well. I have a job and enough has always been a great place to be a great word enough. I have enough my heart overflows and then Father's Day My father is Jim Arena, you may say hey, if that's your father, how come he does not have the same name as you? Well he has the same heart as we have reached the point in our lives where he and I are very similar as far as spirituality and understanding of the earth. And I find that to be awesome because when we when I was a young man going into the Marines, not only did we not see eye to eye but I don't think we saw anything the same. We did not get along I wasn't the rebellious teen, and I was well deserving of his anger at times, yeah, at times, I guess it would be anger. And other times it would be bewilderment. bewilderment that teenagers will give their parents, we raised this kid What is happening? Where is his mind? And my guess is as a teenager, the mind could be anywhere, but after, actually, when I first got in the Marines, and I was going through and there was all the discipline and the yelling, I realized in quick fashion that the discipline my father had given me throughout my entire life prepared me for that moment. So in that moment, when a lot of kids, a lot of young marine recruits were cursing or getting in trouble. I knew Keep your mouth shut, Listen, do what they say. And that will get you through and it did. I got through the Marines they call that what was the term that they use getting thrashed getting thrashed means you messed up, you talk, you talk back to a drill instructor, you said something you should not have said or you were not respectful. And that meant push up, sit up, it was kind of crazy. They will go push ups now. And they do push ups and sit ups, push ups, sit ups, push ups, jumping jacks, mountain climbers. And basically they just had the young recruits twisting and turning. And it was just kind of a mental more of a mental thing than actually a physical thing. But because my father had prepared me in with discipline, I understood what would keep my butt's safe. I've written him several letters throughout his life, always thanking him for that gift that he gave me even in times when I was that teenager that that needed a swift kick in the butt. I remember, this is my mind traveling a little bit. Again, when I was in boot camp. I remember being in the bathroom, and I showered it was at night showered, you had like five minutes to they call that shit, shower, shave, go to the bathroom, take a shower, shave, which I didn't even need to shave at that point. But they still made you shave. And I remember I was on the toilet. And they called everybody to get on line, which means inspection. Every night you would stand on line and they would look in your ears make sure that you were cleaning yourself hygiene and everything was good. They would check your fingernails and ask you if you had any personal or medical problems to report at this time. And they always told us Don't ever say you have problems. They quickly assured us that that was just a routine that Sir, I have a medical problem. Say that again. I don't think you said that correctly. Well, anyway, I was on the toilet. And they called everybody to get online and I said to myself, as I sat there in a towel and flip flops, I'm not going, like, I am fed up, I am going to take an extra couple minutes and just relax on the toilet. And then I realized well I better get out there was that moment of clarity. Whereas I better get out there before I get in trouble. I don't want to get in trouble. So when you left the shower, they had this powder that you stepped in to make sure that the fungus was kept at bay. And as I rounded the corner, everybody else was online. My senior drill instructor Anderson was standing there hands on his hips, yelling at everybody, just in his Marine Corps voice. That's what they did. And I came barreling around realizing that I had to get online and I came barreling around in my flip flops, those flip flops where the thong popped out all the time because they were really cheap. I came around that corner I hit the powder in the powder and the water and I slid I could I was sliding like a wrecking ball towards my senior drill instructor who had his back to me and could not see me but I'm sure he could feel my presence closing in on him, like a cheetah chasing a turtle. It was coming fast. And as I approached him, I'm like I am going to drill him and this is going to be bad. And at the last second I kind of flail my arms back and threw myself back like a gymnast and maybe less than an inch. I missed him. I don't know how I missed him but I did got online. He finished giving a speech to everybody in these. And Mailman. You are damn lucky you did not hit me. I knew like I know. I know. I know. Let me tell you another thing about hygiene inspection during hygiene inspection you would try to get the Marine recruits across from you to laugh which would get them in a lot of trouble. It was a very serious thing to not laugh when you had a drill instructor In front of you, so we tried to get them to laugh. And then they were dismissed when they were done. And then they would try to get us to laugh. And I was standing next to recruit McDonald, Mailman, McDonald, alphabetical order. He was a tall he was really a cool guy, but he was hilarious. When he got the shot. One of the myriad of shots that we received, he actually went like he lost his vision for a little bit. And I remember him walking around like Frankenstein, sir. I can't see Sir. Sir. I cannot see sir. And I know that it had to of been a very scary moment for him. It was hilarious for the rest of us. And of course, his sight returned pretty quick and everything was okay. Well, him and I are standing side by side and him and I are laughing one of those uncontrollable laughs that you can not hold in. And the drill instructor is right next to me and I'm like we I'm in trouble. I'm going down. This is going to be the worst thing that happens to me in boot camp. And drill instructor Sergeant LeFlore trust me you always remember your drill instructors Sergeant on LeFlore stepped in front of me. And by some miracle by some act of God, I was able to keep that laughter inside of me. To this day. I don't know how but I kept it in suppressed it and got out these words. Sir. Recruit Mailman has no personal or medical problems to report at this time, sir. And then I just held my breath I didn't breath, and he looked at my hands looked at me said Okay. And then I stepped around him as he stepped in front of McDonald, he couldn't even get open his mouth because he had so much laughter in there. And Sergent on LeFlore, "Do you have anything to say McDonald? Do you have anything to say?" And finally McDonald opened his mouth and all that came out was pure and utter laughter in the face of drill instructor Sergeant LeFlore and it did not go over well, I am under my bunk on the floor now laughing tears rolling out of my eyes. McDonald. I think we had about a month or for about five weeks left to boot camp. And he pulled the early the worst firewatch, which I think was four to five or four I forget what it was. But it was the one that you had to wake everybody up, which meant that you did it. You just lost an hour of sleep. That's what it meant. And he was so mad at me because he thought I was going to be the one to lose it. But I did and I'm like, I'm gonna be mad at me. I just was able to control it. One of the funniest moments and McDonald's what what a cool, like, I look back at those times, what a crazy time but also, what a really cool time. So I was talking about my father and I went down that rabbit hole which you all know I will do Benny Mailman is a rabbit hole fanatic, I will go down those holes, and I will find other holes. I'll go from the rabbit hole to the gopher hole to the mole hole. I'm going everywhere. I see a hole. I'm going through there. And I'm saying hey, what's down here another story. Another story. Another story. Let's do it. Let's keep it going. And that's what I love to do. Jim arena, my father Happy Father's Day. My mother who I did not get to say Happy Mother's Day to on here, Bernadine Arena. Why are their names different than mine? Jim arena came into my life when I was a very young boy, four or five years old, probably four years old, I would guess it's so long. I don't remember. I remember he brought the strong hand of discipline with him. And for three kids that had their run of the house, doing whatever they want, probably making their mother very stressed. This man came in and laid down the law, no lying no basically no lying. I learned a lot of those lessons the hard way. But he was a man that came in and changed our lives. And we did not know it at the time. But it was for the better. It was something that made us better human beings, better souls, better people to be around and deal with when we were out in society. So Happy Father's Day, Jim Arena married my mother and she took his name and we didn't have my understanding was enough money for to adopt all three of us under his name, the only father I have truly ever known and loved and respected. He is an amazing man talks to birds. He is the bird whisper he is amazing the bird sounds that he can make. He's had quite a storied life. Quite an amazing life quite an adventurous life. So we did not my brother, my sister and I did not take the last name Arena. We stuck with the last name Mailman, which is the name of my biological father and I kept it I am one of the only ones that kept it I actually tried to switch to Arena but then officially they would not allow me to so mailman it is and for what I do the Mailman the Mailman delivers. It seems to fit nicely. I do find that sometimes people's names signify their lot in life and Mailman I am the bringer of news hopefully good tidings. Good news. Love hope soulful invigoration? I hope so why did I write my books? Am I making a lot of money out of my books? Not yet. The word has not gotten out yet. But maybe someday it will. I am working on that. But I really want the books to reach people have fun. It's hilarious writing regardless of the book, book one, Book Two, Book Three, there is the hilarious and the comedic aspect of it will reign supreme and all of those books and also very soulful insight as to a man awakening within this crazy world and with his within his own journey. And I think people will take some really good points and understanding away from that how to awaken without feeling. Some people say oh, well, I don't, it's too hippie dippie. It's too like anything, you are given the option to go 100% 50% 20%, whatever you want. And I think at least a little bit of spirituality and understanding of the earth and synchronicity will help people open their eyes a little bit more and really admire the moment, good moments, bad moments, difficult moments, easy, beautiful, fun moments all in are encapsulated within our journeys. And if we can learn to be aware of them, we will not always appreciate or understand every moment that we go through. But if there is a clarity about the importance of these events that happened within our lives, great, bad or indifferent, then that's a start. That's a really good way I feel to go through life is just have that clarity that whatever you are going through, is in some way related to the lessons that we need to learn. That is my opinion has been email man's opinion. So So I had a Marine Corps story. I talked about my book, I've talked about where I'm at as a teacher, things are going great here. I've enjoyed my life so much with my wife Vicheka our life just it's simple. But it can be simple. If you're with the person you Love. It doesn't like my mother used to say it never matters, New Year's Eve or big events, or it never matters where you are or what time it is. It matters who you are with. Do you enjoy your company? Do you enjoy your friend? Are you happy? Do you have enough? That is the classic word. Enough. All right. So I have a song that I'm not going to do now. But I'm going to say that I'm going to work with Adam Trump and get it out. It is a it's kind of a rap that I worked on two years ago. And I came across it in my notebook the other day, and I like it. I think it's it speaks a lot of truth. It is direct, and there are some parts in it that are very relatable in the world. And the world's history is probably relatable all the time. But I like it. I'm going to share it with you probably in the next podcast or two. And we'll see what you think about it back and give me some comments on it. That would be cool. Otherwise, enjoy it. Or if you don't like it fast forward, right? You have that option. Like Okay, okay, I like you're talking but not so much you're rapping. But that is part of my creativity is writing. And I do have some songs now. And although my voice is not angelic. It's my voice. It's my song. And then I don't have to pay somebody to do it right now. I'd rather hold on to that cash. But what I would like to do for you now is an imitation of Chris Farley's motivational man, which is probably going to scare my wife in the next room because I have not alerted her to this fact. So you may hear a door open and a soft voice say, Are you okay? But I always Loved Chris Farley. And I'm gonna do a little bit From motivational man and you can be the judge as to whether I sound like him or not. And we'll see how this goes. I haven't done this in a while. Oh, right. All right, to give you a little scenario about what my life's all about. First of all, I am 35 years old. I am divorced. And I live in a van down by the river. So I know what you're thinking, you're gonna reach up and grab the world by the tail and yank it down. Wrap it around, put it in your pocket. Well chances are as you go out there, you're going to realize that you're not going to amount to JACK...SQUAT!! Hey, man, what do you want to do with your life? Actually, Matt, I want to be a writer. Well, Ladi freaken' da!, dad, who do we have over there? Is that bill Sahespeare? Actually, Matt, we encourage him to write. Sometimes Dad, I wish he would just shut your big yapper sometimes I think you use in your paper not for writen', but for rollin' doobies. And you'll have plenty of time to roll doobies, when you're living in a van, down by the river. Hey, little girl, what do you want to do with your life? Actually, I want to live in a van down by the river. Well, you have plenty of time to live in a van down by the river when you're living in a van down by the river. All right. See what my wife usually just smiles at me. When I do my my crazy voices and things like that you can be the judge. There's also that one where he goes, I think it was black sheep I could I have actually heard a friend say this or imitate this. And I have never actually been able to find the exact line. But it was where he was trying to be a security guard, I guess. He was like, You and I are going to dance in a ring of fires nightmare You can't imagine. You need to find yourself some different coordinates and get out of this sphector. So that would be my little bit of Chris Farley imitation for those of you who are generations behind me and do not know who Chris Farley is. You can go back and look at motivational man Saturday night Live. Fantastic stuff, folks. Fantastic stuff. So this podcast is going to be a little shorter so that I can get it out. And I have been incredibly busy with editing with exams with school and I'm just trying to get something out there for you to enjoy. And I'm going to try and get probably in a few days when I'm done grading all the exams and I'm done with the editing I will put out another podcast and talk a little bit more about a little bit more. So for now everybody have a wonderful week depending upon when you listen to this have a wonderful everything may every I hope that you look at your life and you say man, how is it possible that my life is so awesome that everything that I think and hope for and my wishes are being presented to me in an orderly fashion in exactly the way I was thinking about them. Thank you Universe so to you to your families. I say Have a good evening. Have a good week. Have a great everything peace and love from Cambodia, Si m Reap to be precise. Take car. Much love to all of you. Aweso e humans of Ear